This week we get deep, really deep, with The Boogens (1981), by director James Conway, who did four episodes of the 90210 reboot. He can’t be all bad, right?. Come on in and join us for the third week of our horror-tober-strava-ganza-thon!
Well, as it turns out, this is one of those movies you can have seen before and not realize that you’ve seen until about three quarters of the film has gone by. It’s pretty forgettable. It’s about these two guys working in a long-shuttered mine shaft that someone has decided to reopen for some reason:
They work with these two guys:
There’s a small amount of nudity and some hanky panky.
And there’s a dog who is more complicated a character than anyone else in the film, except maybe the Boogens themselves (there may only be one Boogen since that’s all we ever see, but the title is plural, so your guess is as good as mine). Anyway, the dog’s name is Tiger. He constantly wrestles with his inquisitive nature, even when it puts him in harm’s way, and he’s not afraid to be self-effacing, even though it’s really his movie.
Anyway, the movie reminds you about five hundred times that there’s a mine. This shot is how the movie does that. Get used to seeing it.
But patience with the persistent and recurrent establishing shots bears sweet, sweet fruit when people start dying.
Unfortunately, Tiger is undone by his hubris and inquisitiveness.
So what horrible monster could be responsible for all this death and horror (death and horror not shown)? Why, the Boogen(s), of course. Here it is:
Yep. Pretty lame.
Finally, what the hell kind of shoes are these?
Anyway, when you’re finished listening to us go on about Boogens without ever (probably) pronouncing the word correctly, head on over to our audio commentary tracks page and listen to us watch the movie. You should probably watch your copy of the movie at the same time, or it won’t seem very funny. After that, go play outside,. But stay away from miners. Or is it minors? Probably best to play it safe and stay away from both.